So why do I want to share this with you today? Well i want to give you a little insight in my life for a bit and the life of other parents that have children with disabilities...seen or unseen. I usually share here on my blog about my journey with healthy living and fitness and the passion I have for helping others reach their goals. However, if you're going to work with me I want you to know more about me and what my life is like and what passions I have. I've always had a love for helping others. This is why I've gone into teaching and back to school for my Masters in elementary education and special education, because I like to help others work towards and reach their goals in life, whatever that may be. So with that, back to my topic today....last week I was having a conversation with my mother about my younger son, we'll call him Z (my wiggle fidget). He is a very busy boy, always on the move. He has a VERY hard time sitting still at any moment and enjoys talking nonstop! He has difficulty with following conversation and will often go off topic if you're talking to him. He'll start discussing something that may have happened a week ago when you're talking about the TV show you were watching when having a dinner conversation. So this year he's struggled in school with being so busy. He's in full day kindergarten. We're currently going through the process of having him evaluated for services. I've been talking with Behavioral Specialists, his pediatrician, his teacher, the special Ed. Teacher, school psychologist, school OT, a private OT, the school speech language pathologist, and so on. So needless to say I've been busy in trying to find out just what my little wiggle fidget is dealing with and how to help him better focus at school and make it through the day without feeling defeated. Which he often does. However, when looking at him you wouldn't know that he deals with all these difficulties, hence the passing judgement when you don't know....not all people or children that have learning disabilities, or struggles are seen to the naked eye. Even when they are visible to you, you still don't know what that child or their family deals with on a daily basis. The other day I was talking with my Mom about my son and his recent appointments and she mentioned to me how one of the parents at my Son's gymnastics made a statement to another parent (in ear shot of my mother) that my son Z is "the rudest child he's ever met". Yup, this parent said it. Not to mention he doesn't actually "know" my child. He's seen him at the gymnastics center, maybe observed him in an hour class, and on this particular day that this parent made this statement, my son was being VERY good! He's was playing with another child and they were not running around the upstairs area, they were not yelling, screaming, or being "rude". He was BEING A KID! So this brings me to my point. This parent has NO IDEA what my child struggles with on a daily basis. This parent doesn't know that he cries to me at night saying that he had to "take a break" at school many times and that he was trying so hard to listen but he just can't. This parent has no idea that my son is being assessed for multiple learning disabilities and that he has an unending urge to run, jump, swing, play, climb, flip, and talk beyond control. That his body wants him to constantly move and he has difficulty controlling that urge. He has NO IDEA that my son has difficulty following multi-step directions and that when I call him or talk to him it sometimes doesn't register until I walk over to him and look him in the eye. This parent has no idea that my son has difficulty processing input through sight, sound, touch, and taste. He doesn't know that my son deals with anxiety on a daily basis. So why...why does he think that he can make such a bold statement about my child, or anyone's child, when he doesn't know them? And this guy is a PARENT! He's basing a judgement on what he has seen a few times without having a conversation with me or my son. I find it so appalling.
This brings me to this blog post today. Before you pass judgement on someone stop and think for a minute. Do you know this person. Do you know what they deal with on a daily basis? Do you know what their life is like? Do you know what they've gone through in their life? Do you know what challenges they've faced? Unless they are your close family or friend you don't know. So before you make such bold statements, judgements, or accusations about their life or their choices stop, say hello, and get their story. Maybe, just maybe you'll learn something. You'll understand. You'll get to know them and be inspired, touched, or changed. People every day deal with struggles with their weight, their health, their confidence. They've battled things that you don't know. Many struggles that people have are unseen to the naked eye. Mental disabilities, eating disorders, learning disabilities, anxiety, depression, health issues are all things that when looking at someone, you wont know their daily battle. So why? Why do we think that we can make a judgement on a tiny snippet of their life? Please next time you think you're going to make a judgement stop yourself. Think to yourself is this right? Is this fair? What are they dealing with and why are they making these choices or acting this way? Stop and think that God has made us all perfect and beautiful in his eye, so we have no right to judge. Then, and only then maybe walk up to them and say hello. Maybe lend a helping hand. Maybe even say to them "hang in there, you're doing great."
Chrissy
Chrissy Locke Health & Fitness
Fit Mommy of 2
chrissylockehealth.fitness@Gmail.com
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